Sensate focus: the bread and butter of sex therapy. In the 1960s, Masters and Johnson developed what became the go-to treatment for couples struggling with desire, arousal, and intimacy - and the outcomes are genuinely good. But it was built on heterosexual relationships and assumes we're all working towards the same kind of sex. As an inclusive, trauma-informed sex therapist, I use sensate focus regularly - but with my own steps, my own ground rules, and a few twists along the way. Here's my version.